Thursday, January 3, 2013

Jeff Foxworthy style!

I was going through my email, and came across this gem from Wayne Allen Root:


Obama might be a socialist if:

If you don’t understand that the reason babies scream hysterically the moment they are born is because they instantly realize they are facing a future of $100 trillion in debt, hyperinflation, 80 percent tax rates and no jobs, you might be a socialist.

If you think it’s a good idea to run America based on big government, big unions, big taxes, big spending and “social justice” — even though Detroit is a one-party Democratic town run with those exact same policies for decades that is now a bankrupt, empty city that leads the Nation in poverty, food stamps, murder, abandoned buildings and broken street lamps, you might be a socialist.

If the only thing you, your cabinet members and czars know about business is from books you read at Harvard or Columbia (all of which were written by Karl Marx), you might be a socialist.

If you want to allocate hundreds of millions of dollars to the Internal Revenue Service to go after tax cheats — even though your Administration is filled with tax cheats, including the guy in charge of America’s taxes (Treasury Secretary Timothy Geithner), you might be a socialist.

If you created the name “Cash for Clunkers” yet you don’t realize all the bribes you’ve given to your most loyal Democratic voters should be called “Cash for Flunkers,” you might be a socialist.

If you think food stamps, disability, aid to dependent children and unemployment checks are “economic stimulus,” you might be a socialist.

If you believe it’s greedy for taxpayers to want to keep more of their own money that they earned but it’s not greedy to demand government confiscate other people’s money and redistribute it to those who didn’t earn it (i.e., your voters), you might be a socialist.

If your tax policies are so onerous that even Denise Rich, one of the leading Democrat contributors in America for the past three decades, renounces her U.S. citizenship to move to Austria, you might be a socialist.

If you think George W. Bush adding $4 trillion to the National debt in eight years was an embarrassment, a travesty and a disgrace but you have no problem adding $6 trillion to the National debt in only four years, you might be a socialist — and a world-class hypocrite, too.

If you actually said “You didn’t build that” to business owners because you think bridges, roads, highways, airports, schools and hospitals led to their success but you don’t understand that business owners and taxpayers paid all the taxes that paid for government to build all those things in the first place and government ought to be thanking us, you might be a socialist.

If you call yourself a “champion of small business” while you demonize small-business owners in every speech and media interview, try desperately to raise their taxes and eliminate their tax deductions, and in just your first four years as President passed more than 60,000 new rules, regulations and mandates that make it impossible to run a lemonade stand in America anymore, you might be a socialist.

If you think the “White House party crashers” are terrible people because they crashed your White House state dinner without an invitation but you want to give instant citizenship to millions of uninvited “illegal immigrants” who crashed our border, you might be a socialist.  

If you think it’s terrible that a college or law student has to pay $9 per month for her own contraception but you see no problem with colleges and law schools — run by your most loyal leftist intellectual supporters — charging that same student $50,000 per year to attend that school so ultra-liberal professors can be paid $250,000 per year for teaching one course per week, you might be a socialist.

If you think anyone who doesn’t read The New York Times is dumb and ignorant but think it’s OK that the Democratic-controlled Congress passed a 2,000-page healthcare bill without reading it, you might be a socialist.

If you think New York Times columnist Paul Krugman deserves a Nobel Prize in Economic Sciences and you deserve a Nobel Peace Prize even though neither of you ever created a job or did anything to produce one minute of peace in the world, you might be a socialist — and an egomaniac, too.

If you think it’s OK to meet with dictators, bullies, tyrants, communists, American-haters and terrorist sympathizers without preconditions but have no interest in meeting with Republican leaders in Congress, you might be a socialist.

If you think it’s OK to give Constitutional rights to terrorists but not to the bondholders, shareholders and secured creditors of GM and Chrysler when you stole the company from them and awarded it to your biggest contributors (the same unions that bankrupted them), you might be a socialist.

If you think it was a good idea to steal $26 billion from U.S. taxpayers to save the $100,000 pensions of union members at GM and Chrysler but it was just fine to allow all the non-union autoworkers to lose their pensions, you might be a socialist.

If you think the “fiscal cliff” is about actually being forced to actually cut some government spending when the real “fiscal cliff” is the $6 trillion you added to the National debt in your first term, you might be a socialist.
If you think things are “moving in the right direction” when food stamp rolls are growing 75 times faster than job rolls, you might be a socialist.

If you think Raul Castro, the leader of communist Cuba, firing 1 million government employees by telling them “government can no longer employ or take care of everyone” and promising to fire another million this year isn’t a hint that perhaps America needs to reduce our workforce of 22 million government employees, you might be a socialist.

If you think it was OK for Nancy Pelosi to pass Obamacare so she could benefit from the special clause on page 1,890 that gives free facelifts to public officials, you might be a socialist. (Just kidding!)

If you want to convert America to a “green economy” to create millions of “new jobs” (even though Spain has proven the green economy destroys three times as many jobs as it creates and leads to 25 percent unemployment — 50 percent unemployment among young adults), you might be a socialist — and an idiot, too.

If you claim to have “saved” millions of jobs with your stimulus package but the labor participation rate is the lowest since 1982 (and for men, it’s the lowest since 1948), you might be a socialist and it’s obvious you learned math from a teachers’ union member in a failing public school.

If you claim you are a fan of oil drilling and you have “dramatically increased” oil drilling during your first term as President while oil drilling permits are actually down more than 60 percent, you might be a socialist – and a liar, too.

If you think denying an American a job, government contract or entry to college because of the color of his skin is immoral and criminal but that giving someone a job, government contract or college admission
because of the different color of his skin is “social justice,” you might be a socialist — and a racist, too.

If you want to abandon capitalism and put the economy under the control of government bureaucrats even though virtually every city, county, State and Federal department run by these same bureaucrats is heavily in debt, you might be a socialist.

If you favor taxpayer bailouts of companies who give you campaign contributions and hand out almost $1 trillion in “stimulus” to unions and leading Democratic bundlers and contributors and hide it by refusing to disclose who got the money or how much, you might be a socialist — and a fascist, too.

If you think putting the same government that brought us Amtrak and the U.S. Postal Service in charge of our healthcare will save us money, you might be a socialist.

If your solution to Medicare eating up almost the entire budget and driving the country into bankruptcy within 20 years is passing Obamacare so we can expand Medicare to everyone, you might be a socialist — and I’m betting you flunked out of public school math.

If you claim you can’t find anything to cut in your budget yet you just gave $1 billion dollars to the radical, American-hating, Muslim Brotherhood leadership of Egypt, you might be a socialist.

If you want to take guns away from law-abiding Americans because a mentally ill nutcase went on a killing rampage at a school designated as a “gun-free zone” (which advertised to that same nutcase that he would face absolutely no opposition because everyone inside was a helpless, defenseless sitting duck), you might be a socialist.

If you blame guns for killing children in Newtown, Conn., but it doesn’t occur to you that you sold guns to Mexican drug lords in the “Fast and Furious” scandal that resulted in 300 murders, including a U.S. border agent, you might be a socialist – and a fraud, too.

If want to lower the cost of healthcare but purposely left “tort reform” out of your signature healthcare reform because you, your wife and virtually every member of your Administration are lawyers, you might be a socialist lawyer.

If you think Whoopi Goldberg and Joy Behar of ABC’s “The View” represent the moderate wing of the Democratic Party, you might be a socialist.

If you’re a Columbia University professor and you ever gave a student named Barack Obama an “A” in economics, you might be a socialist — and you shouldn’t be teaching economics.

And finally, in the 8th year of the Obama Presidency, if Bangladesh is hosting “Aid America” concerts, we definitely have a socialist President.

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2 comments:

  1. Diane:
    My GOD...that is INSPIRED!

    (and is SO damn funny you don't want to have a mouth full of anything while reading it...unless you desire a new keyboard...LOL)

    That's BRILLIANT!

    Thanks for sharing.

    Stay safe down there.

    ReplyDelete
  2. I know - I saw it and laughed and laughed. Unfortunately its' too true also!

    ReplyDelete